Love Yourself Enough To Set Boundaries
I used to struggle with setting boundaries, but now clients often ask how to set healthy boundaries with people we love and do not want to hurt.
Establishing good personal boundaries is crucial to creating healthy relationships, increasing self-esteem, reducing stress, anxiety, and depression. The boundaries you set help to separate what is me from what is not me and protect your personal identity.
By not having boundaries, you give others the power to control your thoughts, feelings, and needs. The process of defining your boundaries involves deciding what behavior you will accept from others and what you will not.
Being clear about who you are and what is most important is the key to success and happiness. It takes courage, however, for a person to take a stand and determine his life's purpose, safeguard personal values, fulfill needs, and embrace their authenticity.
Boundaries that lack healthy foundations are often marked by a lack of self-identity and a sense of disempowerment. As a result, you will begin to depend on your partner, family, and friends for happiness and decision-making resources, thereby losing vital parts of your identity.
The inability to set boundaries can also be attributed to fear; fear of abandonment or loss of a relationship, fear of being judged, or fear of hurting others. Understanding your own limits is the first step to building better boundaries. The person I am, and what I will and will not be liable for.
It is crucial to let go of fixing others, taking responsibility for their choices, saving or rescuing others, need to be needed, change yourself to be liked, or depend on others' approval.
Make a commitment to yourself to put your own identity, feelings, needs, and goals first. Believing that you are OK just the way you are leading to healthy boundaries.